When You Wake Up in Vegas

So I’ve been to Vegas twice this year. Does this make me an expert on the town? Obviously not. But I still enjoy giving out tid bits of information that I think will help any other poor souls survive the streets of Sin City…

1. Don’t book a flight that requires you to get up at 3:15 in the morning. Especially if you don’t sleep well on planes. If you haven’t slept on a plane the last few times you’ve flown- it’s not happening this time. When I arrived in Vegas at 9:00 that morning (their time- 11:00 Chicago time) I was exhausted, but others were already there when I got in, so I was “on the go” from the first few minutes of walking into MGM (our hotel). Because of the time change, this resulted in me being up for a total of 28 hours straight. NOT recommended. It causes wrinkles. I swear.

2. If you’re already being semi-cliche by going to Vegas to do a bachelor/bachelorette (because who wouldn’t want to?), try to be original on the festivities. Enter our Katy Perry-themed night:Sure- everyone loves a good pink feather boa and condom veil (well- maybe not everyone). But we were set at a table next to another bachelorette that did that. And who had more guys come up to talk to us and offer drinks?

Imagine me and 9 other girls in my group pointing thumbs towards ourselves. THESE GIRLS!

Plus, if you do anything stupid, not one soul in that hotel is going to recognize you the next day. Not that any of us would know about this…

3. The buddy system is an awesome idea in theory. But not always easily practiced. Especially in such a huge club like the Marquee in the Cosmopoliton. One girl ended up at Planet Hollywood afterwards because she thought that’s where everyone else was heading. Two girls ended up on a service elevator and walking through the kitchen. And that must be how I ended up walking home solo on Friday night (I was fine!) and stuck sitting in front of my hotel door for who knows how long because I did not possess one of the 2 keys we had (whoopsies). Security does not like this. And it’s also very had to have a serious debate when you’re wearing a pink wig at 4:30 in the morning.

4. Red Bull is gross. As is McDonald’s breakfast. But both are a perfect way to start your morning (separately, not together) before heading to Wet Republic– a pool bar at MGM where we knew some peeps with a cabana.5. Hanging out in a cabana the entire time will deprive you of that fabulous Vegas tan you were hoping for. FAIL. However, after all this 60-degree weather Chicago is dealing me, I loved every second of chillin’ in the 90-degree shade.

6. Biggest douchebag awards will always go to the dude with Jersey Shore haircut making it rain dollar bills into the pool. So, um, don’t do that. Although a few swifty-taken chlorine-soaked dollar bills went towards my second round of McDonald’s breakfast the next day…

7. Pool toys are fun:There’s actually a story behind the masks- I’m not sure how we acquired them the year some of us lived together, but they were often broken out to scare people who were at an afterbar at our house for the first time. It was like a hazing process.

8. Dancing is fun. Dancing to live performances is even more fun:IYAZ came and hung out when we were at Vanity in the  Hard Rock Hotel. Randomly awesome.

9. The perfect way to end your vacation/start your detox is gelato.After my fiasco of having to go to the airport, get my flight cancelled, and having to go back to the hotel (about half the girls were staying an extra night), I was done-zo. As was one of the others. The idea of putting any more vodka in our systems was a no-go, so we went with gelato instead.

White chocolate was a good choice.

10. Being organized is a good idea.However, we could have used about 3 or 4 entire bottles of alcohol less. Because you can’t pack them back into your bag when you’re only flying with carry-on. I guess we were just really excited. Oh well. I just wish we had saved the extra cash. So we could do something with it. Like make it rain at the pool?

All in all, it was a good bonding experience for the girls. Can’t wait for Miss Mary’s wedding reception…I heart this girl!  :)

Oh and here’s a freebie foodie tip for ya…

It’s not really a secret that I’m not a fan of Starbuck’s. I think it’s bitter coffee that is horrifically overpriced. And they have lackluster food (I heart you, Panera!). So on my last day, when I couldn’t do another McSkillet or McGriddle or other McCalorie-fest, I chose to try Starbuck’s “perfect oatmeal” for the first time.Yes. I totally stood with my McDonald’s coffee in the line for Starbucks. I think the girl in the logo shed a tear when I did it. And you wanna know how much they charged me for that “perfect oatmeal” in the MGM Grand hotel? $4. $4! I paid $4 for what I could have made at home for a quarter.

And I sat and ate my oatmeal that should have had gold flakes sprinkled on top. What did I think? It was ok.

But I totally make it better.

The End.

46 Responses

  1. Ahhh so jealous! Looks like you had so much fun. I am in love with that pink wig. I would rock it everyday.

  2. I’m going to Vegas next weekend, and I’m totally laughing right now. My experience is going to be much different. I’m going to celebrate a friend’s 40th birthday. There will be no wigs. We do have an ass-crack early flight, but to me, that’s the only way to do Vegas. We have a cabana for our pool day, but that’s good because I’m allergic to sunburns. (srsly). I’ve never heard of IYAZ. What our trips will have in common is lots of alcohol. Lots and lots. Mmm.

  3. OK, I’m sorry, but that pink wig looks really cute on you. Practical? Probably not. But cute? Yes.

  4. Sounds like an awesome weekend!
    Everything at Starbucks is expensive. I only go there if I have a gift card.

  5. Pricing on food like that should be illegal. It is horrible! Sounds like you had an incredible time lady! I’ve never been to Vegas, but I’m not sure I could handle it. I think gelato was a great choice…that’s what I would have done too. I hope you get some rest today!

  6. Love the recap. Looked like fun ;)

    I am getting up at 4am to head out for my flight. FML.

  7. these are great tips! sounds like a fun trip! my best friend got married last year and we wore wigs out for her bachelorette party too and it was a blast! did you really bring those masks with you to the pool and not find them there?? hilarious.

  8. Looks like you had so much fun!! It’s been years since Vegas for me. I miss it. The Katy Perry themed bachelorette party is so clever. I didn’t have condoms and penises all over me during my party. It’s so gross.

  9. Will you be putting up more pics on facebook? Because I would like to see more. Looks like you had a blast!!!

  10. Planning to sleep on the airplane never really works. I did that once on the way to Costa Rica. My first stop was in Dallas and the sun was up when I got there, so my body decided the day had begun. *Sigh*

  11. Wow it looks like you had an AMAZING time. I love the suitcase full of alcohol and mixers, and I said it yesterday but I’ll say it again – LOVE the wigs!

  12. Yeah, we definitely whipped out the condom veil (with an attached penis tiara) for Vass one of the nights we were in NoLa. She kind of hated us for it. And I will say, we were actually hit on more when we were dressed like Tom Selleck. I like your carry on. You clearly know what’s up.

  13. Honestly, I am losing track. How many times have you been to Vegas in the past five months? Is there a point at which it makes sense to invest in a wig for Vegas trips? Is that point the point where you realize that, yes, you probably do need to pack a suitcase of alcohol?

  14. Your Vegas bachelorette party blew my friend’s PA bachelorette party out of the water. However, we were also extremely successful in free drinks, and that’s what really matters in the end, right? I will say that I am extremely jealous of the wigs. Next time… (God help me if there’s a next time.)

  15. I decided the last time that I did a 5:55 a.m. flight that it would never happen again. Yet, whenever I booked my flights home for labor day – guess which time I picked. Clearly, I’m not so bright.
    I love Vegas though! Looks like a ton of fun!

  16. Sounds to me like you left all the juicy details out of the recap! :)
    Do you need a vacation from your vacation now?

  17. Looks like you had lots of fun (minus the flight fiasco). :) I had to take the early flight out when I went to Vegas last and it really did SUCK (especially when everyone else could sleep in). I feel ya!

  18. i dont think there would have been a better place to party than in Vegas. if you’re gonna do it right, do it big huh!! <3 these photos are amazing- they also managed to perk me up- shows how much energy there was there if it can radiate through the photos!!

    xoxo <3

  19. This trip looks like it was a blast! I’m going to assume the guy making it rain by the pool is single?

  20. I love the them of the bash! Looks like you guys had a great time and you are becoming a Vegas expert. I’m coming to you if I ever decide to go!

  21. I’ll never understand why oatmeal is so GD expensive in public… do they not realize that I can buy instant oats for 5 bucks at Costco and get 112 servings?!

  22. haha omg amazing recap! I have never been to vegas but dying to go!!! everyone always has so much fun, I mean how could you NOT have fun?! and yeah the oatmeal is outta control expensive when really that costs about 6 cents to make!

  23. ummmmm I want your life! crazy aquired masks and all! you rock so hard! Glad you had a blast… now take me with youuuuuuuuuuuuuu! <3

  24. Oh you poor thing!! You must have been exhausted hanging out in front of your hotel door!
    And those masks are hilarious! :-P

  25. Looks like you had a great time! I’m not allowed in Vegas. Well, I am.. but I am not able t handle it. I’m totally a wussy girl when it comes to partying, and Vegas kills me.

  26. […] everything except that I’m still yet to unpack from my trip last weekend, but we’re calling it a minor detail. Unpacking is the worst. And my theory is that if I […]

  27. Haha, $4 is ridic. Your weekend looks amazing! I’m so jealous!

  28. Looks like you had an amazing time. And there’s really no better city in the world to party all weekend.

  29. […] It’s bittersweet. I’m happy to have a few weekends of downtime. But starting with our crazy bachelorette trip to Vegas and ending with a gorgeous wedding of two of the most genuinely wonderful people I’ve met, […]

  30. […] I don’t like to gamble. Ironic, being as how much I love Vegas. […]

  31. […] It has been over a year since I’ve participated in pre-wedding shenanigans. […]

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